There are three questions you can ask someone that will open up their way of talking. Both their tone and patterning of their speech and the range of topics they are willing to talk to you about.
Have you ever come close to death? Have you ever been accused of something that you didn’t do? Do you know the circumstances of your birth?
That’s it. If you are ever somewhere having a conversation with someone that you are building a little rapor with, at some point try to ask one of these three things. If the person is warming up to talk to you, it will change things to bring one of these game changers to the table. What you hear from this person will be different. And this is regardless how they answer this question. The effect lasts well after you are past this part of the conversation.